Life Lessons from One of Parenthood’s Happiest Milestones
“Melancholy is incompatible with bicycling.”
~ James E. Starrs
“I’m doing it, Daddy! I’M DOING IT!”
So cried our six-year-old daughter as she glided across the yard on her bike for the first time this week.
Her feet pedaling hard against the mini-mogul bumps in our yard; her laser-like gaze over the handlebars screaming of focus and determination; her smile giving the afternoon sun a run for its money as it shined brightly against her red face, flush from the heat of the day. I stood back, leaning against the garden shovel in my hand and just beamed. A flood of memories from the past six years of her life washing over me in an instant.
Watching your kids learn how to ride a bike is a right of passage for most parents. It falls somewhere in-between the first day of school, losing their first tooth and getting their driver’s license. At this age, there seem to be so many firsts that it’s tough to keep track. But you do. You’re able to put aside all that adults things running through your mind and find that little nook of space in your being to just take it all in; to explore the overwhelming feelings of love and admiration for new insights into your own being. Such events ground you in what it means to live simply and deeply each day.
Watching your kids learn how to ride a bike also brings into focus life lessons that we as adults seem to so readily forget as we go about our grown-up lives. Wrapped into all the encouragement we’re passing along to our kids as they struggle to keep their balance and momentum are really important guideposts for how we should be living our own lives. Watching my daughter this past weekend really brought these things info focus:
- Try new things — even if they are a bit scary at first.
- Determination is worth its weight in gold.
- It’s OK to fall down sometimes as long as we get back up.
- Being in the moment is where the greatest joy lies.
- Sometimes, a bit of forward momentum is all you need to accomplish your goal.
- Never hesitate to express genuine and heart-felt appreciation to someone you love.
- Approach everything with the eyes and heart of a child.
It sounds so simple. So easy. Why then do we so-called ‘grown-ups’ seem to lose this innate ability for living life to the fullest?
I think it comes back to every single thing you and I know as adults. All the things that go into our day-to-day existence: responsibility, accountability, making ends meet, working, paying bills, raising a family (if you have one). Or even the societal demands pushed upon us by our culture of consumerism: fitting in, must haves (and wouldn’t-be-caught-dead-having), getting ahead at any cost, selfishness, greed, superficial competitiveness of all sorts.
Maybe we all should just stop and watch a kid learn how to ride a bike every now and again. Maybe then we’ll reconnect with that innate thing that is more powerful than anything our lives can throw at us.
Be well,
Bill
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[image: derepy]
Well done Bill. I remember very well the first time I got on my brand new bike and somehow got the nerve to head off into the brilliant blue of the unknown. However old we are, and I won’t burden you with my age, let us never lose the lust to move beyond our existing boundaries.
There is a beauty and beingness within us that doesn’t have a depth. Every good wish.
Christopher // I just love every word that you write. It drips with such wisdom and clarity. You’re right — learning to ride a bike is one of those memories that sticks with us no matter our age. Maybe because it’s one of those moments when you grow that proverbial set of wings and can be free in some new and fantastic way. Hope all is well with you.
There should be a national ‘watch a kid learn how to ride a bike’ day. Maybe world peace would follow, or at least, we’d all learn the power of determination, joy and momentum. Lovely post, Bill.
WOW! This is incredible, Bill. I felt free, like I did in the endless summers of my youth, that wistful, carefree feeling. Me and my 5 siblings all rode bikes and had to sometimes share, but we didn’t care. We were just happy to experience that feeling of flying down the hill.
I think the first time we manage to stay on the bike and move forward, we are enchanted. We not only feel a deep unforgettable sense of accomplishment, but we’re filled will wonder. We may not consciously equate that wonder with movement, balance (while moving), movement created by us, or the fresh air blowing in our face and ahir, and cooling the sweat on our necks on a hot summer day, nonetheless, we FEEL all these things. And in that moment we are set free. We are compelled to hop on that bike and ride again and again, just to feel that freedom.
This whole post brought tears to my eyes. Beautiful, good feeling tears. Then I thought about things you wrote here about adults, and sadly many adults simply see the bike as a tool or mode of transportation—although I wish more did LOL!
— instead of seeing it simply as JOY. My husband and I have mt bikes, which we don’t ride in the mts. as they tear up the mts. But we use them as pleasure bikes on tarred biking trails. Reading this, I just realized we have not yet had them out this summer!!! So this post is just too cool, and makes me realize that we need to get our bikes out of the shed.
What a beautifully poignant and wise post, a happy post. So grateful!!! Thanks Bill.
PS: You and your wife HAVE to watch this video. The little boy (who just learned to ride his bike) is just soooooo adorable. I want to HUG him. The dad behind the camera is also wonderful the way he laughs at the end. And it just confirms ALL that you say here. You will love this video!!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=eaIvk1cSyG8